Guest Blog - 4 Foundations for Getting Your Equine Career on Track
Posted by Seth Burgess on Sun, Jul 18, 2010 @ 04:45 PM
4 Foundations for Getting Your Equine Career on Track
by Beverly A. Buncher
When my clients are wondering what to do first to get their lives or careers back on track, I often ask them how they are doing with the basics. As a life and career coach, who often works with people whose lives are affected by their own or someone else’s blocks, I call these basics The Four Foundations of Family Recovery ©, but truly, they are foundational principles for inner growth for anyone who wants to move forward in their life since they are about the relationships we have with ourselves and others. We coaches have a saying, “How you are in one part of your life is how you are in all parts of your life.” So, by starting with a check up on the basics, I help my clients get a handle on what is and is not working in their life and how to get things back in sync.
The Four Foundations© are:
1. Self Care. Often, when things aren’t going our way, one of the first things to go is self care. Sometimes this can be as simple as brushing your teeth, as routine as exercising 3x or more a week, or as fundamental as eating nutritional food to keep your brain fit.
2. Being a Loving Person. This one can be less obvious but its lack in your life can be just as insidious and certainly just as important in its own way. Being a loving person means:
a. Treating others with dignity and respect even when they are acting badly (doing so without becoming a doormat becomes evident in foundation #3)
b. Treating ourselves with loving-kindness even when we are operating at less than our best
c. Not doing for another adult what they can do for themselves
d. Saying what you mean and meaning what you say without saying it mean
3. Setting boundaries for your own well-being. Boundary setting is difficult for a lot of people. It means:
a. sometimes having difficult conversations with people
learning how to say no when you mean no and yes when you mean yes
b. learning how to say no when you mean no and yes when you mean yes
b. knowing what you can and cannot tolerate in your life and learning how to communicate that to the people who are important to you at home and work
c. being able to stand by your word – not only in your commitments to others but also in your commitments to yourself
e. not making idle threats or giving empty ultimatums, but rather, getting to a point where you are good for your word and people know that if you say something, you mean it
4. Getting support. For many people, getting support will be the most important of the four foundations because without support, they won’t be able to achieve the other three. Supports can include:
a. Friends and Family members
b. Therapist, Life Coach, Minister, Riding Instructor, Colleagues
c. Support group (12 step, therapy, or coaching group)
d. God (or whatever you call your Higher Power)
e. Prayer and/or Meditation
f. Church, mosque, synagogue
Often, when I first bring up the 4 Foundations©, my clients wonder how this is related to their goals. But when they begin to look more closely they get it. These four principles of taking care of yourself, being loving to self and others, setting boundaries that feel right to you, and getting support to live your best life and live up to your principles, are all about getting your act together in relationship to yourself, others, and your God (if you have one). By getting clear in these fundamental relationships, other things begin to gain clarity. You start to know what you want, what you stand for and where you want to go with your life and your career. You see yourself as someone who is effective in their own life and in relation to others and so you begin to be able to transfer this sense of effectiveness into the choosing and achievement of your goals as well.
For me, being a coach is being someone who knows how to ask the questions that can help my clients move forward in their lives to become who and what they want to be. If you think you could benefit from having a coach to help you take your next best steps, give me a call and let’s talk! Or, if you know someone who you think could benefit from working with me, please share my name and number with them!
In the meantime, thanks for reading and see you next time!
All the best,
Coach Bev
Beverly A. Buncher, MA, CEC
Family Recovery Coach (AKA The Empowerment Coach)
Author of the forthcoming book Family Recovery 101: The Four Foundations of Family Recovery©
www.theempowermentcoach.net
(786) 859 4050
About the author:
Coach Bev works with those whose lives or careers are stalled and helping them find their way to a saner, happier life. A horse mommy, she has spent many hours visiting barns, grazing horses and watching horse shows. She is skilled at helping her clients move past the blocks in their paths to live the lives they most dearly want to achieve.